The Vagina Monologues, to be precise.
After a long time of reading about the popular play by Eve Ensler and
its various adaptations, I finally decided to watch the movie, by the same
name. It was out of plain curiosity. I had recently read somewhere that the
play's Indian adaptation by Mahabano Mody Kotwal recently completed 10 years
and it had always been controversial, I just wanted to see what the fuss is all
about.
What followed, were 77 minutes of candid, witty, funny, deep, intriguing
and sometimes cringe-worthy episodes. Eve narrated with a rare honesty,
episodes centered around themes such as love, sex, orgasm, masturbation, birth
and sexual violence. The film also had excerpts from interviews conducted by
Eve, while researching for the play.
What is significant is that this came at a time when so much is being said
about women's rights, freedoms, role and perception in the society. There is so
much of discussion and debate about something I, personally have believed is so
obviously fundamental - equal rights, opportunities and freedom for women. Why
do we even need to question that? It puzzled me back in middle school when
we were taught that a feminist is a person who believes in equal rights for
women. Umm, don't we all? What seems apparent, is that we don't. Sometimes
subconsciously, blindly following the cultural misinterpretations and at other
times, because of our deep rooted set of values that itself is a culmination of
a culture that has not only denied an equal status but has devoided half of its
population the right to discuss matters that concern them, and are an intricate
part of their very existence.
It is this 'glass ceiling' that the movie breaks. It is also what it makes the
film a treat to watch. Never before have I seen someone discuss issues as
intimate as one's first menstrual period and one's embarrassment at the sight
of the vagina in a way that is poignant and humorous at the same time! The film
is largely anecdotal. Some of them can be easily related to, we've all been
there and done that! (And for the first time, that little happy squeal which
comes from the realization of not being the lone weirdo can be more than just a
whisper - because here we have someone who's celebrating it, with panache!).
The other anecdotes - like the one that
described experiences of women in Bosnian 'rape camps' left me feeling
aghast.
Eve Ensler needs to be thoroughly applauded. Not only for her awe-inspiring
performance in the film, but for the sheer brilliance with which she has
managed to compile such profound experiences and brought them to life!
Incidentally, I came across
this piece by
The Mad
Momma. It reminded me of what Eve said in the beginning of the film
-
"I bet you're worried. I was worried. That's why I began this piece. I
was worried about vaginas, I was worried what we think of them, and I was even
more worried that we don't think of them."
Though I do not agree with all that MM
has to say (the disposal-in-newspapers issue can well be attributed to a
simple, hygienic approach adopted keeping in mind the shoddy waste disposal
system that we have functioning in our cities, and the hush-hush surrounding
washing dirty linen is justified to quite an extent by a simple word -
'privacy'. Talking freely about menstruation and the likes is one thing, but
that still shouldn't invade the personal space one is entitled to!), I get the
point MM is trying to make. I've seen practices unreasonable to the extent of
being downright crazy, being employed with such unflinching, unquestioning
ease. We still deny women the right to enter temples, or touch anything
considered 'holy' for that matter, while they're on their period. From making
them eat in specific utensils to making them sleep in separate beds and washing
their (even if spotless!) sheets to debarring them from entering the kitchen,
even. I get where all this is stemming from. I get that we've been a
patriarchal society for centuries and that's probably how such rudimentary
practices came into being. But now, out of sheer exasperation, I feel
compelled to exclaim - we're in the 21st century, dammit. How long
are we going to take to get our basics right?
Anupama Mohan talks of the concept of 'phallogocentrism' -
"It is the idea that our societies are
centred by the phallus and language (logos).."
Unfamiliar with the etymological manifestations and their eventual cultural
implications, I had a conversation on the lines of the same concept with my
friend A a while back.
I'd asked A what one is really implying, while calling oneself 'in favour
of equal rights for women but not a feminist'.
A had (very proudly) answered by
drawing an analogy. He said that it's akin to someone who frequently uses words
like ch*tiya or b*hnchod but still respects
women, as is the case with a lot of my friends.
It could also be someone who dances to
the tunes of a rap about raping a woman and sings along, but 'in principle'
respects women.
I found this explanation fundamentally flawed. I couldn't (and probably still
can't) articulate it well enough, but something here is not right. You cannot
use such sexist profanities with ease if you really do understand the gravity
of the issue at hand. Maybe it doesn't reflect upon much of your attitude
towards women in particular, as it does upon your tendency to unthinkingly
absorb what is prevalent culturally and inculcate a habit out of it. That
trend, in itself, is quite disturbing. And if you're the artist(s) in question,
it should 'in principle', prick you conscience. You might not have penned the
lyrics, but you did know what you were singing and the mass appeal and
influence that you generate. Banning artists can never be a solution but some
self-regulation on the part of the artists cannot hurt anyone. What's also
important to note here is that it not something subjective, but an established
evil - rape.
It also brings me to the question - why do women 'in favor of equal rights for women'
suddenly want to distance themselves from the epithet 'feminist'? What is wrong
with being one? As a very eloquent friend (another A! A female, this time!)
described, feminist by definition refers to someone who believes in equality,
not psychopaths looking to establish matriarchy! Why then, is it suddenly out
of trend to identify oneself with the cause one's counterparts have been
fighting for, for ages? Why are we suddenly feeling that
feminism doesn't fit into modern times? Why
does it have to be
this feminism or
that feminism? Why can't feminism as a
movement, derive its strength from it's diversity? Like in Eve Ensler's play,
we might be different women facing apparently different issues, but the
fundamental goal remains the same. I know it's much easier said than done, I
know that what I'm saying is probably a gross simplification of an immensely
complicated social scenario, but it's still better than passive cynicism, in my
humble opinion!
Veena Venugopal, In her article, takes the topic of female
desire head-on! (Much like Eve, if I may add!)
As she puts it,
"If I am asking for it, dude, you will
know it. ....
We
probably don’t talk about what we desire enough. But we certainly think about
it. So this will probably come as a surprise to you. When you proposition us,
on the road, in the bus, or at a movie theatre, and we say no, we are not
saying that we don’t feel any desire. We are simply saying that it’s not you
who we desire."
It's as simple as that! And then they go on ranting about women being
complicated! *rolls eyes!*
It's sad how this
approach, despite being so simple, has not been comprehended by most fractions
of our society. As a result, not only do we deny the existence of such an
entity as female desire but end up ridiculing it!
I while ago I was discussing the DPS RK Puram MMS Scandal with a friend of
mine. I couldn't help feeling sorry for the girl, not because the MMS went
public or her 'modesty was outraged' or anything, but simply because I felt
that she was a victim of the society's hypocrisy. Not her folly. A 17-18 year
old making out with her boyfriend. What's wrong/new with that? The whole act
was supposed to be a private affair and not leak out in the first
place. Instead of rebuking the boyfriend for leaking out the footage, we
ended up ridiculing the girl. What a shame! I heard a rumor that she's
at Harvard University now! And the self-confessed Amreeka-obsessed freak that I
am, if by any freak chance the girl happens to be reading this, all I want to
say is - YOU GO, GIRL! KUDOS!
And now that I've
realized that I've ended up typing a tediously long post which I don't really
want to edit because I strongly feel what I've written, I think it's befitting
to end the post by quoting Eve Ensler's closing lines from The Vagina
Monologues -
"So, here we go, here we go. Okay, we're done."
Cheers!
